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May 2020

Maybe someone got cold feet and didnt care if it was helpful or not, as long as it was not dangerous for them.

I think the topic was a bit too dark for a webcomic forum, especially one that also has user who are under 18. Even tho I found the mod's comment a bit insensitive to the situation, I think they are also in their right to close the topic.

There have been many of these threads being made and I am not trying to offend or belittle anyone or their problems, but this is first and foremost a webcomics community created by a for-profit company. I feel there are better places to have these types of conversations and they could potentially put Tapas at risk legally speaking if someone were to give bad advice that led to harm.

Also, random people on forums are not healthcare professionals. I would venture a guess to say that probably nobody or very few people here are equipped with proper training to offer advice. I just don't see there being much new help that a professional isn't already able to provide, beyond the scope of just needing somewhere to vent or someone to talk to. In those cases though, it's probably better to find a more casual forum or discord server and find people to connect with.

I understand what it's like. When I was in college, I was in a poor situation that led me to being very lonely and depressed and having no one to turn to. So I ended up venting much of it on my LiveJournal. It helped a bit. I would recommend finding a place like that where it can be personal with a close group of online/IRL friends that would like to listen.

EDIT: I also want to say my inbox is always open if anyone wants someone to talk to. I'm not great at giving advice, but I am willing to listen and am up for offering internet hugs or the like.

I think that is the exact problem- not that it got shut down but HOW the mod responded- it very very tasteless considering the entire point of the OP

its still a bit sad that it would get shut down condering she put the warning like a responsible person but the way it was shut down would rub a lot of people the wrong way

This is why I don't post any long messages on this forum anymore, or any message that took me long to write.
Now, I'm here to keep in touch with people, not to discuss, which I won't do if I'm constantly afraid of being shut up.

Ratique is a forum mod, not a healthcare professional. Personally, I think the way she responded was fine. She is in no way obligated to speak on the topic and I am sure she is not authorized in any way to give personal advice. Likely, again due to liability, those lines are the most she can say. She has said them in other similar threads as well.

Sounds like valid reasons. Too bad, these versions comes in blatant contradiction with Ratique's explanation why it is closed. Re-read her explanation. This is what super-toxic. It is almost mocking, in the context of Doki's words.

Completely removed from the situation, I see a neutral response. I don't believe Ratique meant any offense by it.

sometimes an apology is valid even if you don't mean any harm or offence.

Yeah. Of course. Let's be cowards and hurt people because of petty fear of very-very-small probability of legal problems.

In that topic she clearly explained her hesitations, why she doesn't discuss it with professionals.

DOKI TOLD THAT SHE CAN'T REFER TO HOTLINE, NEITHER TO HER FAMILY, BECAUSE THEY DON'T LIKE HER, NEITHER TO FRIENDS. AFTER IT, RATIQUE TOLD EXACTLY "REFER TO HOTLINE, FAMILY AND FRIENDS". DON'T YOU SEE MOCKING HERE?

ARE YOU BLIND?

I don't see mocking, but I see insensitivity.
And probably a difficulty to put herself in someone else's shoes, although it could be because she did not read all the messages before closing the topic. I strongly dislike Ratique's moderation style, but I don't think she was mocking anyone.

Hola,

unfortunately this forum isn't the best place for topics such as self-harm and suicide. We have always closed these kinds of topics in the past and will likely continue to do so. I appreciate the concern and apologize for this to be upsetting.

I'm actually very concerned about the well being of our creators, even if my replies sound otherwise. As mentioned above I'm not comfortable with providing my opinion in such a dangerous topic. Please try not to add tone or intention to my words.

WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED I WAS ONLY GONE FOR AN HOUR

I, uh, just wanted to say that I hope people aren't up in arms about this for my sake...like I said before, I wasn't actually depressed when I started the topic; I was just musing. I do think it's an important thing to think about and discuss, but it that's all it was meant to be, not a cry for help or anything.

In the context of it belonging on the forum or not...I, too, was pretty surprised that it got closed. '_' I've seen other topics (like actual super-depressing vent-threads) breaching similar territory, and I even put a trigger warning in the title; I thought it'd be fine.

But I guess if it's not wanted, it's not wanted...at the very least, it still exists, so you can still read it. Maybe start a topic reframing the issue in a more 'sanitized' light, if you still want to discuss it...?

A light suggestion:

How about we have the two main people involved speak for themselves?

Because right now, all i see are high emotions and assumptions thrown around.

As a bystander, I prefer to see Doki or Ratique speak instead of an entire thread being made to start a downward spiral. Some of you weren't there for the Bitching Threads.

Edit: See, they responded. No need for all of this.

DOKI TOLD THAT SHE CAN'T REFER TO HOTLINE, NEITHER TO HER FAMILY, BECAUSE THEY DON'T LIKE HER, NEITHER TO FRIENDS.
AFTER IT, YOU TOLD EXACTLY "REFER TO HOTLINE, FAMILY AND FRIENDS".

You seriously don't see anything wrong here?

I mean the problem is >other< people could have been finding some solace and meaning in the thread ^^; So sadly its not JUST doki and Rat who would have passionate emotions about it. Tho im happy that Rat is available to give us all more clarity on what her intentions where. It at least makes me feel better, even if it might not make everyone feel better

You are speaking completely irrationally.

I get that you are defending someone who is mentally and emotionally hurting, but you are also not considering Ratique's position in all this. She is NOT healthcare professional. If she misspeaks on something, it could actually cost her her job.

I would say her response is not only appropriate, it is the only type of response she can give.

If you could flag those for me when you see them, I'll happily take a look. I try to see them but must have missed them.

I always like your threads and think they're very useful, but this one was simply a topic that we typically avoid. I hope you didn't take offense and I'm glad you're not feeling depressed.

Well, it's not only for your sake. It's for other people's sake too. Including mine, because I also like to whine and discuss edgy things. :sweat_smile: