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Mar 2015

The crabs scuttle towards my legs, which are lying in a bloody pool about five metres away. I try to swat them away, forgetting that my arms are five metres in the other direction. Oh well.

My nose is itchy.

Suddenly I hear a voice. It's calling my name. I can't answer, cause my throat is full of sand.

A huge figure emerged from the Sand. I tried to run but the sand wont let me. The figure moving slowly toward me.

Panic cut off my breathing. I was not going to make it. The crab are waiting. They know I am done. This figure. Would he help?

The figure emerges out of the sand, scaring the crabs away. When he finally emerges I recognize him as...

"Why should I?" He respond coldly, "the last time I helped you, you abandoned me at a bus stop! It took WEEKS to get home!!"

"I had no choice" I pleaded, "this is different, help me!!"

He raised his hand, glinting above the fiery, tentacled, sun that has burned me for so long. His hand burns with light, as the sun reaches from eons away, to shatter apart from him. The light tantalizes my unwilling eyes to squint, and barely make out the preposterous event I was seeing. The sea behind him frames his outline, as I see the glinting, evil hand, come down towards me. Menacingly, it rears what could possibly be the meanest behind and fingers of all time towards me. The hand, the messenger of what has been killing me for so long, it's impact ripples across my face. The shock winds it's way through me and utterly destroys any trust in humanity I had left. My tongue hurts so much, not from the gritty, paperlike texture of the sand, but from the way he has slapped me, SLAPPED ME, SLAPPED ME, SLAPPED ME!

And then I passed out.

When I awoke I found myself in a very dark room. I fumbled around for a bit trying to find a light switch, my face and tongue still in massive pain. My hand finally landed upon some sort of lever. When I pulled it, the lights came on, and I was shocked to find myself in...

16 days later

There... there are no doors? I -I -I How did I get in here? Nonono! Him! Adren Broy! He must have brought me here. I asked for help. But of course he would take advantage of my position to take me in. I was cold and bloody on a beach. It was a perfect setup. Now I was caught. I am now the rat in the cage. That is where I am, right?
I am in his scientific, research 'facilities'; right?

Despite the freezing temperature, you were sweating buckets. Clutched in your sweaty hand was a wrapper. In fact you were surrounded by these wrappers. Carefully peering down, you squinted your eyes to read the label. It said, "Atomic Fire Ball Candy."

Oh god, you are allergic to those darn things! Just thinking about it made your tongue and face burn with a fiercer intensity of a thousand glowing suns.

Hey does anyone want to illustrate this? If they do, just give me a shout (and possibly the name/place it is). I believe this is in the public domain to use. If anyone wants too, go right ahead.

I- I- I- I my head. The world is spinng. Red is filling my vision. Red hotness is burning at my cheeks. @#$! Adren! What have you done! What are you trying to do?

All those candies has made me uncontrollably gassy. I know I shouldn't fart right now but I can't help myself from addressing my natural instincts.

I ignore my greater instinct and keep the fart within me, for the fear of not knowing what would happen far outshines any reprieve I would receive.

Suddenly, from somewhere outside the room there was a great BOOM, like someone pounding on the walls in anger. The sound surprised me and the fart that I'd been trying to suppress escaped me with great relish (and a slight texture of relish near the end). It was such a massive fart that it blew the candy wrappers into the air, and I saw that there had been someone lying beneath them this entire time.

I approached with caution, trying to see her face, and with a second shock (and a tiny butterfly fart) I saw that it was ...

It was my mother! What could she be doing here? And... why does she have a violin in her hand? She doesn't play anything. But either way, I was worried. I hoped my farts didn't kill her.