Jan 2021
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Jan 2021
Jan 2021
SWestComics
Jan '21

Now of course there is a quick rundown of what my comic "Happy Pines19" is about. The story is set on a remote campground located in Nova Scotia Canada where a few weeks ago a group of campers went missing during the night while they went to explore the nearby caverns. All the bodies were found chewed up by some kind of animal except for one which is still missing. The camp has just officially reopened and we follow one of the employees, Ash, as she slowly begins to uncover what truly happened to the body that was never recovered.

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    Jan '21

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    Jan '21
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cookieroach
Jan '21

I looked through your pages and I have some feedback. I hope it's ok with some constructive things.

Your obviously good at drawing and I think the premise seem interesting. There are a couple of things I think can be improved when you go forward.

Dialogue & speech bubbles: There's a lot of dialogue, I think some of it can be removed. Dialogue in a comic/movie doesn't have to be super realistic, it's better to only keep the parts that are relevant to the story. When there's a lot of dialogue, you can separate the speach bubbles into smaller chunks for better readability.

Backgrounds/perspective: I like that there's a lot of backgrounds in the comic, you can tell where the characters are without being confused (I can be lazy when it comes to backgrounds...). I like the outsdoors panels, but think that the perspective can be improved, especially when the characters are inside (for example at the reception scene). It's nice with a colored comic, but the coloring has white spots in some places, like everything hasn't been filled in.

Good luck with your comic :slight_smile:

Puck
Jan '21

Good job on the comic!
And congrats to uploading the comic.
It´s always good when somebody is asking for feedback.
There are some things which I see which I also have problems with myself.

One small thing which can easily be fixed, the speech in the speech bubbles is
often too close to the bubble´s border. It would look more professional when
the text is centered more with more space in the bubble

Number one is perspective. You are on a good way but it looks like you need to put more time
into it or plan the perspective of the scenes better.

Number two is the style, the characters look the best in the dialogue they are having in
the car. I see a change of style and also quality in the other panels. There are some
panels where it looks like you put more effort in like the other panels. Like the last panel
in the car. I would go with one style, which maybe can be a little bit more simple for
the start but one style you are able to draw the whole comic in

dannygorny
Jan '21
1

Always happy to look at more Canadian Content!

I'm not an illustrator, so I don't have a ton of comments about the art, but I wouldn't recommend background details that look like they were hastily completed in MS paint (like the road signs in Ep.2). The character acting is okay, which is a good sign, and the hook is promising. It's clear from the art that you're developing, and there's enough promise that I want to see how you level up.

As for the dialogue and speech balloons, your hand-drawn balloons really took me out of it.

Frankly, they look sloppy - enough so that it made me not want to read more. Not saying you NEED pro software like illustrator, but please do check out a professional guide like this one to get yourself started in learning how to do standard speech balloons. That change alone would vastly improve your story's readability: (http://clintflickerlettering.blogspot.com/2010/10/lettering-in-adobe-illustrator-one.html)

For an unambiguously positive thought, remember that the first step to improving in any skill is to DO SOMETHING. You're doing that, which puts you one step further along the path to success. Keep at it! I just subscribed to see how your story turns out :slight_smile: