Ah yes... 90% of my time editing sex scenes is looking for alternate words to say dick so the text isn't repetitive xD
You can make some interesting poses and use magic and scifi stuff to make it more varied, but at the end of the the day, sex needs a real emotinal conection to feel interesting.
I just skip 'em most of the time.
Most of the time I just don't want to read sex scenes, I'm ace, it's just, not my thing. Sometimes I force myself to read through them because "I'm a grown adult, I should be reading these" but they're just very hard for me to care about or enjoy. I just want them to be over with so everyone can get back to the plot or none sexual flirting/romance kind of stuff.
Sometimes it's just written with too many metaphors or flowery words to explain things that just turn the scene either really creepy, or just... into a joke. VERY fast.
Some times the sex is just... physically impossibly wrong. As in, 'he plunged his throbbing manhood deep into her clitoris' or 'his ass was wet with anticipation' wrong. It's just... no... basic sex ed is important... stop...
Hahahahaha, I laughed too hard at this. I totally get what you mean about how some people skip the sex scenes because you can't feel any connection.
Though I love sex scenes, if I feel nothing for the characters, I just scroll past it. I suppose I prefer the foreplay more so then the act of doing it, since it's just literally penetration until one or both comes and finishes.
Do NOT get me started on the flowery language of sex. I absolutely hate reading those type because I'm too busy imagining all these metaphors and then my immersion sort of breaks. Ofc some people loves those purple prose, and no hate to them, but I was never a fan of purple prose to begin with haha.
To add to this, I’ve noticed any time I put an “M” on a chapter in my novel, those chapters have double the views than a non-mature chapter. It’s like people will read those first to see if it’s worth reading the whole thing in general (like reassuring themselves they’ll get steamy scenes).
You know, all this talk always makes me wonder If i'm doing right by my fellow demi and ace.
I am demi myself and surefire way to make me not care about sex is to have it be underdeveloped, the lead up to the sexual encounter and the circunstances that create the mood have to be done well, and the feelings have to be well estabilished for me to care.
I did many chapters in preparation to set forth scene on 'ep8 chapt 4' of the story, where it's effectivelly 'the first time' with all of my characters together. And on pretty much every NSFW chapter so far, there is some sort of 'setting the mood' I don't like just putting the characters imediatelly at it.
I guess I just worry too much about everything ^^
@Maps
I was so suprised when I realized that... Like... I was thinking about deleting NSFW chapters the other day, but when I looked at stats, they have an average viewership that is much higher than other chapters (some almost twice as much)
Kind of makes me a bit wierded out cause I don't mature just sex scenes, and now I fell like I should xD
I like sex scenes. I like reading them and I like writing them.
For me, the key is that they should serve a purpose, and/or advance the story line.
I've read porn with plot and enjoyed it, but when I'm writing about sex in my book it's a result of or results in something else.
You can also be suggestive/steamy without talking about mechanics. It's all about how you craft it. If you're uncomfortable about how graphic your sex scene is, then ask yourself whether that level is required in order to drive some point home, or emphasize something. Example: couple has just experienced life/death situation and **** graphically/cathartically. If it's just there for 'wow let's have them ****'...well, consider toning it down, but don't delete it.
I also agree with some of the comments here that it will turn off a certain type of audience, but you're going to get that anyway, you can't field everyone's tastes.
Finally, I don't think a story with sex in it should be devalued like it often is. Like jeez...adults have sex, it's ok to talk about it.
Hope that helps! 
I write sex scenes occasionally, but it's usually wrapped up in innuendo, or cuts off right as the graphic stuff begins. I'm not particularly interested in writing full-on smut, though I'll certainly do it to help the characters (or to get more readers lol). I try to avoid any scene going into full-on erotica, even when it's pretty graphically described, though, but it's more because I don't feel confident enough in my writing skills to actually pull it off.
@NinaWrites The emotional ones are definitely the best.
Funny enough, I'm more the opposite of you. As a pre-teen I didn't mind smut but now I tend to skim it. I'm just not as comfortable with it as I used to be. Especially depending on the scene itself, how graphic it is, and the characters. I decided to leave my own up cuz why not?🤣 And I felt it served a purpose to the characters relationship and building trusting intimacy.
@djourner I always try to refrain from mention any parts like dick, etc...🤣 But that's just me, and it makes it a little easier.
@Kura Understandable. Everyone has their own tastes. I know some people just aren't into reading sex scenes. I've been kind of skimming most that I've come across in stories too. But that's kinda why I brought this up. I felt like maybe it was too mature of content (readers wouldn't be comfortable with it) and needed to be omitted for the site.
I definitely agree on them needing some kind of purpose. I used the ones I wrote to build intimacy between my two characters and show the bond that's growing between them.
Sometimes I get too embarrassed by what I write, if I'm honest.
🤣 Which is why I brought this topic up a while ago, wondering if maybe I was too graphic and needed to tone it down. It's difficult to tell what's accepted when it comes to showing sexual content and what's not. While novels have more freedom than comics, I'm still like ehhh. Maybe this needs a more "fade to black" kind of scene.
So true how we can't please everyone. Might as well just write what I want! Thanks so much for the advice.
Not saying you can't, but it for todays standards, it would probably read silly xD
That and... You will see those words a few. hundreds of times on an nsfw story, you kind of have to go for as many variables as you can.
I don´t think more graphic things should be censored in novels and I like writers who have an extreme style.
When you make it steamy, make it crazy steamy. Most stories and comics are too prude for me, too many
topics which make me fall asleep instead of making me interested how it continues. I can understand
every person who is not interested in sex scenes, to each their own, I personally don´t like violence or
car chases and things like that
I personally enjoy writing them if they have relevance to the story and don't come up every five seconds! (ie not just mindless sex for the sake of it, I'd rather have my characters have a romantic connection that is being revealed) ...I had censored my own work for quite awhile because I let myself be influenced by the prudish behavior across the internet. ("Your work must be watered down and safe for everyone to consume or you're a bad,bad creator!") But I've thought about it and my work was never meant for children anyways. I don't write safe YA fiction. I don't write soft, sweet stories. (Maybe soft, sweet scenes within the work sometimes but yeah.) That wouldn't be me being honest with myself. When I realized I felt free with my art/writing as a teenager but not now... I felt sad. I've been allowing myself to put more of my feelings into my work and if people don't want to read it because of dark themes or sensuality, well - that's okay. That's why I put warnings. 
My creations are my passion and that includes putting myself into them (no mater how "scary" or "sexy").
In the words of Madonna: "Oops, I didn't know we couldn't talk about sex." 🤫
I'd say it's more for the people with a good sense of imagination, and the author also has to have good and detailed writing in order for the reader to bring out that imagination more clearly.
@Puck I'm honestly fine with either, steamy or more of a fade out. Just depends on the scene itself. Everyone's got their own tastes!
@MeltingCORE That's a good point. I've never been a fan of mindless sex that happens all the time either. Every five seconds is too much for me. 
I honestly considered censoring mine too, especially with how sexual content gets treated on these sites anymore. It's a lot harder to censor sex scenes in writing, but they come across as more "unprofessional" to some even when decently written. It's more common to have them as fade to black moments. It's so weird that it's required to water down sexual content but not violence. Like, it's totally fine to show a murder but having a dick out? No way. That's too far!
It's great how you're writing what you want to now too instead of following prudish guidelines. As long as it's consensual, I honestly feel like showing sex scenes is perfectly fine. No need to shame it. If I've showed the awful side of my character's addictions, why wouldn't I show this side of them too?
@TL_Nonoke Thank you!
@BAFr Also, a really good point. I'm sure the scenes I wrote won't compare to some professional erotic writer, but I did my best with them to show intimacy and bonding between the two characters.
This is where I tend to stand on the subject. Sexual interactions between characters tells me little about them at best, and at worst, absolutely nothing. I don't need to see them 'being vulnerable'--for a some people, sex isn't vulnerable at all, it's just sex. For others, they're bound to be be vulnerable about other things in addition to sex so why do I have to read about that specifically? Everyone wants to say "It's natural and part of human life", but so is farting (which you can also be vulnerable about!), and no one gleefully writes about that. 
(I can understand if someone includes them to garner views. That's fair. The online world, especially, is a tough code to crack when it comes to keeping viewers.)
