Will edit your blurbs (for free)

[Panqiuyan]

mine have two
After a breakup, Lia Lin Ai got into an accident. Strangely, a cupid offers her a second at life, putting her soul into the body of a girl with a similar name. Without the memories of said girl, can Lin Ai live her life? What happens when her old connections come into the picture? update when I'm ready

Thorns of the Forgotten Rose | Tapas

History tend to repeat itself. In the magnificent palace schemes, blood sheds and betrayals are the norm. Li Yuan Emperor of Tang Dynasty, Empress Fang and Concubine Wu are in an entanglement. The battle for the position of Empress began. Two sons are born. One innocent ruined and the land turned chaotic. Will the three individuals choose the same choices? Will everything be good or once again blood is spilled?

Romance and Retribution v 2 | Tapas

[ZatchZ]

Cool!
I just started writing my novel today!

Can you take a look?

The World Is Ending And You Can't Do Anything to About It

[Awesomeness_Studios]

Okay here's my blurb

Saving the princess can get tiring, especially when you hate her. Welcome to a world where odd video game logic rules, everyone has superpowers, and the final boss is definitely up to something messed up...

JumpHero | Tapas

[Eliteone]

I have edited my blurbs a few times already. As it plays an important role as the first impression, it must be constantly improved. Thank you so much for doing this.

Here is my summary-

Asura, a demon, infamous for his intimidating powers and cruel tactics is betrayed by his only friend on his journey to becoming the demon king. Reincarnated as a 16-year-old human with the purpose to crack an entrance exam which is supposedly the most difficult task in the universe, Asura has a second chance to prove his worth.

Correcting his past mistakes, Asura has now decided to lead this life as a loner and not to trust anyone. Underneath the peaceful and simple life of the human world, he discovers the dark nature of humans, which is not very different from the demons.

Even after being a very hard worker, Asura finds himself struggling with his studies. Using his demon tactics, he tackles the challenges that fall upon him and his classmates.

Join Asura on his journey and super relatable academic problems.

Check out A Demon Gives an Entrance Exam on Tapas https://tapas.io/series/A-Demon-Gives-an-Entrance-Exam

[alcoholandcaffeine]

So, we are following Seth, most of the time, but his small circle of friends also matters a lot in some.. parts of the story, since everyone has a role (Healer, Fighter, Mage etc.)The main objective is to defeat all Bosses of 100 islands and get out of the VR game they're trapped in. But the villain, the creator of the game isnt playin fair. Just keeps making it harder for everyone as the time passes.Idk how to tell you about the story more without spilling major spoilers

Haha, no worries, that clears it all up already Let me see what I can do...

---

A Death-Game ensues when 61 million of the world's population get trapped in Knights & Mages Online. Seth Kiah, the Winner of the Beta Test, has been exiled. The Creator has gone Villain and is hellbent on making everyone's lives harder.

Even though the game is rigged, Seth Kiah and his crew fight to defeat all Bosses of 100 islands and get out of the VR they're trapped in. Because that's their only chance at survival. And Seth hasn't won Beta just so he could die in Alpha.

The game is on.

---

Okay so I improvised a bit in the middle there, and idk really if the game version following beta is really called alpha lol. But I hope that helps show you what I mean about characters and conflict!

[alcoholandcaffeine]

Thank you for this 🥺 I don't know how many times I've edited my description yet it still doesn't look right to me xD

Hiii! Haha, well, maybe I can help

It was all wrong. Everything was going so horribly wrong… and then, his last light of hope appeared.

I think this is redundant here. It tells me nothing about the story or the characters.

At his sleep, Shinichi was able to see the world's true form. Most importantly, he could somehow level up people's abilities and, eventually, he could obtain those maxed out abilities for himself! Thus, he begun his journey of collecting as many powerful people as he could. With this, he could return to his former glory...

This is a good paragraph! I do have a few edits:

In his sleep, Shinichi was able to see the world's true form. Most importantly, he could level up people's abilities and eventually obtain those maxed-out abilities for himself! Thus, he began to collect as many powerful people as possible, so he could return to his former glory...

There's also an odd figure in his dreams that resembled him… must be his mother right? She seemed to be warning him: "The world's devouring has begun and it won't stop until everything's consumed" or some other cautionary words.

I like that we're upping the stakes here, the structure is a bit confusing though. How about...

An odd figure who may or may not be Shinichi's mother kept warning him of the dangers to come. "The world's devouring has begun," she cautioned, "and it won't stop until everything's consumed." Or something.

Well... who cares about the end of the world anyways? He has other things to do. These warnings were not going to help his current situation. Best to ignore it!

And here I think restructuring could help it flow better:

Well...who cares about the end of the world, anyway? He has other things to do. Best to ignore these ominous warnings that aren't going to help his current situation.

---

Well, those would be my suggestions! Hope they helped but feel free to ignore them if they didn't!

[alcoholandcaffeine]

Oh my, would you? Mine is pretty short but I keep trying to spice her up just a little bit more.

Haha, nothing wrong with short, especially if the story/comic you're creating is also short
That being said...one single sentence can't convey a whole lot about your characters and conflict

The story of a sorrowful princess who would no longer allow anyone else be broken as she had been, reached out to the horrors of the world to help her undo the damage of her crown.

Can you tell us what's the name of the princess? Who/what broke her? Which horrors of the world?

Like I said, short is fine! But it does have to include some specifics which will entice your readers to pick your story, over all the other sorrowful princesses out there. If you can give me a few more details, I could try to whip something up for you!

[alcoholandcaffeine]

thank you for this, I could really use the help, I suck at blurb writing.

You're welcome! Honestly, editing be like that - it's easier to do it for other people than for yourself, lol.

Shiro is an energetic martial artist with a big heart whose friend was corrupted by power. He'll do whatever it takes to show him the light, but can you change someone that doesn't want to change?

Honestly, I think this is really good, especially if your comic is short! It packs conflict and character in two well-paced sentences, which give the readers just enough to leave them wanting more. Are you looking to expand it?

Timmy is a sweet, shy kid forced to endure harsh bullying. Little does he know, an Angel is looking out for him.

That's so cute! I like. It reads more like a logline than a blurb, though. But, again, if the story is super short, this is probably enough

Caleb Connors is dragged into a fight for his life when an unstable man with unholy powers tries to kill his Guardian Angel. Can the unlikely duo find the strength to defeat him?

I like this, too, but I'm a bit confused about the unlikely duo. Which is it? Caleb and the unstable man? Caleb and the angel? The angel and the unstable man? I'm thinking it's probably Caleb and the angel, but it's 'unlikely' that threw me off - why is it unlikely, when you're referring to him having a guardian angel as if it was a normal occurrence?

When the lively and hopeful Tara finds herself stranded in a mind-bending alien realm, she must conquer its unknown dangers to survive - Until she asks herself if surviving is a replacement for being happy.

I think this one could use a bit of expanding, on account of 'alien realm' and 'unknown dangers'. Those are both a bit too vague. And I don't understand surviving as a replacement for being happy If you're not surviving, then you're dead, and you can't be happy anymore

[surenlicious]

Well Jade Kingdoms is a novel, and I actually went from a big blurb, to a very short one. The novel is HUGE, I'm not even kidding. XD So, the big blurb is currently this:

[ JK big blurb ]

This is the tale of its Jade Princess Suren, born into a cycle of abuse manifesting itself as generational trauma which has plagued her family for eons. Molded by her surroundings and people, her own will and choices were subtracted from her at birth. As her mental strength falters with each passing day, Suren suddenly discovers something terrible amidst the shadows of the kingdom; a danger a mad prophet erased from history tried desperately to fight back against yet failed to do so.

The revelation causes Suren to slowly drag herself out of the earth she fell upon and walks with her dimmed light to find the fuel to set herself ablaze for the sake of her people. As Suren's journey unfolds, many of her kin she finds suffer from the same treatment in the Jade Kingdom culture and she realizes its not just a mere prophecy coming down to end her species.

The fight for everyone's well-being is at stake and its time for change.

I actually have a tiny website where I talk a bit more about Jade Kingdoms, the cast and some plot bunnies. Might that help?

Jade Kingdoms

And let me just leave my novel here too haha!

Jade Kingdoms | Tapas

[Sethstiel]

OH.MY.GOD!
That is good!!
Can I use that for my explanation?????

[Lemon_Aide]

Here's a lil blurb of a novel I'm working on ^ ^

---

Ruby has always wanted to lead a fulfilled life; landing a position in her dream job, marrying the love of her life, and constantly be surrounded by the company of loyal, loving friends.

But when David Marquis, the eccentric boss of the company she works under, comes into the picture, things take a drastic turn for the worse—or so she thought. Suddenly, she now risks everything to secure a lover's vows, fix her deteriorating friendship, and open up to inner introspection.

To exacerbate matters, she must manage all of this while juggling the care of an adopted son under a false pretense of marriage.

---

I checked out your work, and I absolutely adore your writing style! Looking forward to more to come!

[AwesomeSoFar]

I'm glad you think the first two were good. I'm not looking to expand them, though, so I'll keep them the way they are.
as for the third, the unlikely duo is supposed to be Caleb and his Angel like you thought, but I can see how that'd be confusing. I guess I should replace "unlikely" with a word that makes it more clear who we're talking about.
and for the last one, I guess it's worth expanding on since it's longer than the other stories, at about 6 pages. the surviving thing is me trying to incorporate the dilemma of "survival vs happiness" into the blurb, as it's in the themes of the story. like with the last sentence of that Goodbye, Rival blurb. but it's a bit of a complicated subject so its hard to sum it up in a catchy and interesting way haha

thanks for your feedback! I really appreciate it! it seems like the more complex my stories get the harder it becomes to write blurbs for them.

[alcoholandcaffeine]

Hey, everyone! Just wanted to let you know, since it's the Internet and we all expect instant replies haha, that I'll be making my way through all of your posts over the weekend Thank you for dropping by and please bear with me ️

[Skyscion]

Thanks for doing this!

Here's mine-

Fighting over the most ridiculous stuff, trying to escape punishments using all sorts of tricks, bemoaning the non-existent cafeteria or perhaps, the soaring price of the food there.

Arguing like mad with friends but then going back to them only, when loneliness sets in.

Skipping assemblies, cursing the march past, the freedom of the PE period and the 'official' bunking for school events.

The care of teachers, the craziness of friends, the feeling of first love and the endless notorious escapes...ah, those were the days, our cherished...school days!

[alcoholandcaffeine]

Cool!I just started writing my novel today!

Congratulations Could you please paste the content of the blurb as a post in this topic, for easier editing?

OH.MY.GOD!That is good!! Can I use that for my explanation?????

Haha, glad you liked it! Of course, go for it

thanks for your feedback! I really appreciate it! it seems like the more complex my stories get the harder it becomes to write blurbs for them.

Happy to help! And yes, that's always the dilemma, heh. As authors, we feel like everything we put into the story is iMpOrTaNt lol, so it's hard to pick and choose.

and for the last one, I guess it's worth expanding on since it's longer than the other stories, at about 6 pages. the surviving thing is me trying to incorporate the dilemma of "survival vs happiness" into the blurb, as it's in the themes of the story.

Maybe you could work those specific words in - survival vs happiness. Off the top of my head, something like...

Survival vs happiness is the name of the game as lively, hopeful Tara ends up stranded in a mind-bending alien realm. She must conquer its unknown dangers to survive...but will she be happy?

Wild improvisation lol. And I just realised I'm not entirely sure what you mean by survival vs happiness

[alcoholandcaffeine]

I'm very interested in how others see it. No need for much, Just want to know if it gathers any interest.

Haha, all right, then!

The A.I. won the war when it figured out how to hack the resistance’s bionic enhancements.

In a last ditch effort the ‘No Steel' project launched, with the hope of creating humans, strong enough to face a mech.

The project was never completed. Fearing the A.I. could learn the basics of genetics, all volunteers were launched into space.

Ok so this whole first part reads like an exposition. It's all a very interesting set-up, but I have a feeling this is either a previous book or some sort of backstory, and I can't tell yet what it is that I will be reading about.

Many years later, 'Fall's stasis casket lands on a distant world.

With nothing left, he lets go of the past and tries to survive on his new world.

But this second chance, might be a new chapter of the Mech War.

Here is where the story finally begins, and we only get 3 vague sentences about it. Is Fall the protagonist? What about this distant world? Ok so all the rest was his past, but if he needs to let go of it, why are we reading about it in the blurb? If the story is going to be about Fall on this new world, then I would like to know what his present/future conflict will be on there, rather than what's already happened and I won't be reading about. If that makes sense? Let me know if it doesn't

[alcoholandcaffeine]

This is super nice of you.️ I'm struggling with my blurb a bit.

Haha, thank you! Hope I can help

Chippo wakes up surrounded by an eternal mist. Not knowing how he got here or why he's all alone.

This is a good start! I would maybe connect the sentences with a comma, rather than a period, like this:

Chippo wakes up surrounded by an eternal mist, not knowing how he got here or why he's all alone.

Noticing all his ordered packages are coming from an unknown sender, he starts wondering is he really all alone?

This is where I get a bit confused. How do the ordered packages come into play? If he is in some place he doesn't know, how does he end up ordering packages? Or are they packages he'd ordered before getting isekai'd? Also, the sender is unknown, which doesn't add up with ordered - if Chippo had ordered those packages, then he would know who sent them. Do you think you could clarify that point in the blurb somehow?

[lumisullivan]

Here's mine

Akilah, a 17-year-old girl is broken when she finds the headless corpse of her childhood best friend Adara. Adara had been wrongfully accused of cheating on her soon-to-be husband, the King of their nation, a man who had been blinded by deceiving people. The perpetrators behind Adara’s wrongful death were many but none of them were exposed or held accountable for it.

Life is unfair - those are the first words uttered by Akilah after burying the headless corpse of her best friend, Adara. Desperate and on the brink of insanity she decides to make a deal with the devil in order to gain power and rewind back time. Will the deal workout in Akilah favor; will she be able to save Adara from the monsters that killed her or will history repeat itself?

[alcoholandcaffeine]

After a breakup, Lia Lin Ai got into an accident. Strangely, a cupid offers her a second at life, putting her soul into the body of a girl with a similar name. Without the memories of said girl, can Lin Ai live her life? What happens when her old connections come into the picture?

This is overall good as a blurb, it sets up the character and the story nicely. I do have some grammar and structure adjustments, though, and I will improvise a bit on some details, feel free to correct if I'm off the mark.

After a break-up, Lia Lin Ai got into a fatal car accident. Strangely, a cupid offers her a second chance at life, putting Lia Lin Ai's soul into the body of a girl with a similar name. Without the memories of said girl, can Lin Ai live her life? What happens when her old connections come into the picture?

History tend to repeat itself. In the magnificent palace schemes, blood sheds and betrayals are the norm. Li Yuan Emperor of Tang Dynasty, Empress Fang and Concubine Wu are in an entanglement. The battle for the position of Empress began. Two sons are born. One innocent ruined and the land turned chaotic. Will the three individuals choose the same choices? Will everything be good or once again blood is spilled?

Ok, so, this packs a lot of info, which is great, but I'm having some trouble following the structure. I'm going to try to re-write this in a way I think would be clearer:

Li Yuan, Emperor of Tang Dynasty, Empress Fang, and Concubine Wu are in an entanglement. Two sons are born - the battle for the position of Empress begins.

Bloodshed and betrayal are the norm at the imperial court, and history tends to repeat itself. With one innocent already ruined and the land turned chaotic, the palace schemes of the three individuals will dictate the fate of the Tang Dynasty.

Will they choose right or wrong?

[alcoholandcaffeine]

Saving the princess can get tiring, especially when you hate her. Welcome to a world where odd video game logic rules, everyone has superpowers, and the final boss is definitely up to something messed up...

This sounds very interesting, but I think for the genre you're writing in, quite generic. Your last sentence could potentially apply to most VR stories out there. So I need to know what is it about your protagonist or your story's conflict that should make choose this one, over all the others. Who is your protagonist? And what is their specific story?