11 / 13
Feb 2021

So a little bit of background: Last week I decided to put my passion project of ten years known as Drachenseele (or just the cast of Dragoons and the setting of Anticthon as a whole) in the box for a bit after I realized and thought for a bit that it would be better for me to let it rest and move on for my own sake and health and growth as an artist.

The main problem is that after fully deciding to bury the Dragoons after ten years of nonstop work, my entire motivation for work and art has just kind of dried up. Like, I want to work on something creative even if it's something as simple as just doodling something up to come up with new ideas for future projects. I simply just... Can't seem to do that any more.

You see, One of the main things that initially motivated me to get better at art and writing and keep working at it was my unhealthily lofty view of perfectionism I had for the Dragoons to get "good enough" to finally be able to make my passion project at my unhealthily high standards for that one project if that makes sense. Now with that project officially and thankfully dead for my own sanity and health, I feel I have no motivation to want to keep doing art or creative stuff just for fun or for the sake of it.

I know i shouldn't bring back trying to make the Dragoons work as my main goal due to how unhealthy it made me, but I feel I need to find a new motivation for doing art and getting better at it.

So how should I pick up the pieces and go from here now that my entire initial (And pretty unhealthy) reason for doing art is (thankfully) dead and in the box for now?

Thanks for the help.

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    Feb '21
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    Feb '21
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Your body and most of all, your mind, are telling you to rest.

So do that.

Kick back. Don't do any art or try something "just for fun." Or try something entirely different. (I once carved a chess set doing that) I find that when I get to that point where I realize I've wasted three hours playing a stupid matching game on my tablet the time isn't wasted, I'm letting myself rest.

When you're mind and body decide you're rested enough you'll know and jump back into the fray.

That's probably it. Ever since i made my decision to cane Dragoons I've been super exhausted and had a bit of a headache for the week. So I think i might just need to kick back and rest until I feel better enough to jump back into it.

If only I can get out of my "gotta keep working on something" mindset faster....

don't freak out if it takes you an extended amount of time. I've had up to a few months between heavy workloads. If you feel you just HAVE to work on something, make it short little projects. Try things you've never done before.

Experiment.

Really, truly. Get into experimentation. I used to model for artists and one of my favorite artists would come to sessions with the wildest things to try and paint with. Once he brought in a handful of sticks that he tied together to use as a paint brush. He ended up with some pretty cool things, none of which looked like me! haha

Take up cooking, Birdwatching. building robots etc if you feel you need to be busy. or just slather some paint on the wall and watch it dry.

If it weren't for the pandemic I'd suggest volunteering at a local community theatre. they always need someone to help with sets and with that, when the show finally goes up, you see the results of your labor.

You've earned the time off.

I get the feeling that a lot of your previous posts were about asking what you should do. Break that habit ASAP. No one is an expert on your mind, body, and soul more than you.

I got the impression that you weren't fully trusting your own ideas, thoughts, and intuition without co-signing. Personally, I've gone through that and it lead to some serious problems for me. Other peoples opinions, as useful as they may be, are insights and resources to making your visions a reality. They are not instructions on what you should or shouldn't do.

I would say whatever project you take on, start trusting that it's right for you. Only Ask how to do it better after you've done it once. If you want more advice go all-in more often.

Sorry if that comes off insensitive. I can relate as I've fallen too deep into this. Help is good as long as it's supportive above all.

Spend some time doing “nothing”. There’s nothing wrong with that. By letting your mind rest, your going to get some great ideas.

But if you still want to create, I’ll give you some of my own experience. I’m not going to tell you what to do, just what I’ve gone through myself. Maybe it’ll help you, or it wont, but anyways...

I’ve always loved creating (writing and painting), but I often get stuck on an idea and want to do it perfectly, I want everyone to love my ideas (which isn’t possible). The only way I’ve been able to move on, is to go back to my own interests: what do I enjoy? What are my interests? Then I find my passion again. This will sound super silly: but do you have a certain type of story that you wrote as a kid that you like? Maybe you could try to find some inspiration there. Sorry if it sounds weird. But I think the problem can be that we try to be perfect. Just do something without any pressure. If you do that I promise I’ll read it!

Hey!
So I have a lot to say on this particular topic.
First things first, what everyone above has said, rest is essential. You've worked yourself to exhaustion on a project, and the burnout there hits hard. To poorly paraphrase something I've read online, creating and consuming art is like breathing out and breathing in. When you create, you're pushing energy out of yourself, and when you consume art, you're refilling that energy. If you've been exerting energy for a long time, you need time to refill it. Go do things that will refill you. Read some books, watch some movies, play some games, try art that you're unfamiliar with that won't feel like work anymore (cooking, knitting, painting, collage, sculpting, who knows), go for long walks and breathe some fresh air if you safely can, see some things you've never seen before, etc. etc.

I got very badly burned out on a project that I had worked on for years as well, and it almost felt like part of me had died when I realized that I needed to drop it. I won't say that the experience was identical to yours, but I know what it feels like to pour all of yourself into one project that almost starts to feel like an extension of yourself. I wanted my project to be perfect in every sense of the word, and I wanted it to be loved by everyone who read it. That goal was impossible from the start, and eventually led me to failure.
In my case, I wound up taking a break from creating for several months until ideas for other things started to flow again, eventually leading me back to "Redux". (A lot of people have said this in the past, but my creativity only came back once I wasn't looking for it anymore. It's funny how that works.)
In my case, moving from a very serious project to one that's sillier and gave me more freedom helped me a lot. I've given myself LOTS of room for imperfection and growth. I expect people to find flaws with it, and that's okay. I honestly couldn't be happier with the process right now, despite (and maybe even because of!) all of my little imperfections and flaws. It's a project that's undeniably mine. Perhaps something like that will work for you as well, and perhaps not.

Second, also to agree with what's already been said, you've been asking for advice on almost every step of this project. There's nothing wrong with asking for help, but it almost seems like you don't trust yourself to make decisions. If you choose to continue creating, it might be wise to take a step back and figure out why that's the case. These are your characters, your worlds, your stories. Not every decision we make in our work will be the "best one", but they will be your decisions. For better or worse, your decisions are what make it something that only you could have created. That's part of the game and part of the process.

You're the expert on what you need, and you're the only person who can really say what's best for your future projects. Have a little faith in yourself!

If or when the creative juices start flowing again, I look forward to seeing what you come up with! In the meantime, take care, have fun, and get lots of rest.

Like others have said, it's good to sometimes go dormant. Like a tree doesn't have leaves in the winter, but it's not wasting time, it's just working on stuff inside that no one else can see, youknow? And because it goes dormant, it can make leaves again in spring. Doesn't mean you're not allowed to draw or anything--it can still be relaxing so long as it isn't tied to any commitments or comparison, but if you put away your art and your projects, they'll be there when you come back. It's rusty at first, but it'll come back.

Hello. I did not really know an inch of perfectionism, but I do have a time I was stunned and I couldn't take up the pen and draw.

Firstly, I have the impression that you are someone who loves and put a lot of value on this project you have in mind, that you are meant to be 'dedicating your life' to it, that it is everything in the world. Suddenly an image occurred in my mind. A man who looks at his favourite rock and forget to enjoy the other various interesting things in his environment.
Go out and play. Take a step back from your 'rock'.

Secondly, sometimes it will be beneficial to do something else so that you can return and see the same problem with a better perspective. No, it does not take a few days, it takes more time than that.

Well, I'm currently on a break (burnt out my wrists again) so maybe I'll just tell what I'm doing. ^^;

At this very moment, I'm painting. It's been a while...this morning I dug up my old acrylics, cracked open a never-before-used sketchbook, and started painting a random girl with blue hair. I want to do things unrelated to my usual work, to help avoid the temptation of falling into old habits.

I always have new stuff I wanna work on, so I've never been in your shoes exactly...but I think the core idea is the same: can't do the stuff we used to do, but we can't just stop, so we have to find new ways to express ourselves artistically. It sucks, and it's hard, but if you gotta, you gotta.

If I were you, I'd just start a new story. But in the event that you can't, you should do something totally unrelated. Try a new art medium, do some cooking (another thing I've been doing), go through and reorganize your old art, if you have it. I mean, you did things before Dragoons, right? Maybe looking at them will spark something.

A few options are open to you

Do short stories
Do promo art / fan art of random things like little posters or something

My personal favorite is make 1 to 3 characters (human esque or animal doesnt matter) and use them as thing to draw during this time. Make a character that you want to draw picking up trash off the beach, surfing, shopping for groceries, or just chilling with a switch in their hands. That way there's no story firmly attached to them, maybe they have a name, maybe they don't.
So when you think up "hey i wanna draw someone eating a watermelon", you don't have to think "who would be good to draw eating a watermelon?" You can just pick up this character and use them.

If I'm stuck with original works, then sometimes I'll go back and write a fanfiction one shot. It's a fun and easy writing exercise where my characters and settings are already in place, I just get to make them do what I want and usually my one shot turns into a minimum of 20k words angsty drama fest with some good hurt/comfort tossed in. It almost never fails to get my writing spark back.

Try a bunch of things until you find what works for you! Some people do best taking a break away from all things creative and others do best switching to a new creative outlet for a bit and still others do best by just powering through until their spark is back :heart:

Thanks guys. it really means a lot to hear all these ideas and encouragement. i guess I always feel like I need to keep moving , keep learning, keeping working so I can be growing as a person and not wasting my life and precious time and not pulling my own weight so to speak. I guess it ties back into that self worth thing of needing to be "useful" or working on something at all times in order to seem worthwhile and needed.

I think I need to a hard reboot of my entire thought process regarding work and creativity in general. Because it's really not healthy to have at all.